Jump to content

英文维基 | 中文维基 | 日文维基 | 草榴社区

Talk:Al Worthington

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review

[edit]
This review is transcluded from Talk:Al Worthington/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Kosack (talk · contribs) 13:30, 5 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]


Picking this one up as well, review coming as soon as possible. Kosack (talk) 13:30, 5 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

[edit]
  • "Acquired by the Giants in 1953, he began his career with the Giants", slightly repetitive double use of the Giants here. Perhaps drop the second for the ballclub or something similar?
  • Might be worth linking Shutout.
  • "most of the 1954", this doesn't work as it stands. Either season needs to be added or the needs to be dropped.
  • "The Reds acquired them", do you mean him rather than them?

Early life

[edit]
  • "He was the seventh of 10 children", it's generally advised to avoid switching between words and digits in the same sentence when using comparable figures.

Nashville Volunteers (1951–52)

[edit]
  • "for Nashville in 1951", this is a little repetitive as the section begins with basically the same wording. Could probably just cut it.

New York/San Francisco Giants (1953–59)

[edit]
  • "On that date, he was promoted", what date?
  • "suffered the loss in a 3–1 loss", double use of loss is a little repetitive.
  • "getting no decision in an eventual", should that be a no decision?

Coaching career

[edit]
  • "Then, he replaced the retired Marv Grissom", minor point but the then could probably be dropped here.

Very little to complain about really, placed on hold for now while these are addressed. Kosack (talk) 16:17, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

All of my comments have been addressed, happy to promote. Kosack (talk) 12:57, 9 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]